2 June 1887
Nova,
Oh, how delighted I am to hear that I have your support! My grandfather was quite shocked by this development, as I'm sure you can imagine, but I did manage to get him around to my side on the end. Mr. Devine came for dinner last night and now everything is quite settled!
Of course I would love to tell you every bit of it, but most of it was so very mundane... I don't mind telling you that I had my sights rather set on him ever since spending the weekend with him at the Pettigrew's house-party last November, though I know I told you not to make any ado about it. I didn't want to raise any sort of fuss or get anyone's hopes up (including my own, I'll admit) when I was so unsure of his feelings! We've seen each other quite often since then, but always in rather innocuous fashions, and I wasn't sure at all whether he had any particular fondness for me or whether he was just too polite to decline my company when we talked. I invited him out to the theatre with us on my birthday--you remember that, of course--and it was rather bold of me because I wasn't even sure whether or not he would accept!
That was the first suspicion I had that he might feel... similarly. He sat next to me the entire night at the theatre, if you didn't notice, and that seemed like a very encouraging sign--but I still wasn't sure about anything and I thought perhaps I was projecting how I
wanted him to feel, rather than how he
did feel. He might have just sat next to me that night because he didn't know anyone else, you know.
Then at the Coming Out Ball... oh, I don't even know where to start! I was a little distracted, and he noticed that--but then I can't even remember now exactly what we said, so I'm afraid I won't be able to give you as thorough of an account as you would doubtless like! Mr. Dawlish was there, I remember that--and I was quite distracted trying to avoid getting into any sort of close quarters with him. Mr. Devine and I stepped out to get some air--his idea, I think, though of course it was exactly what I needed. He could tell something was wrong, and he kept asking me about it--so eventually I told him about the situation with Mr. Dawlish. I didn't go in to all the specifics, but he responded immediately and said he would be glad to tell my grandfather he wanted to court me, instead of allowing him to marry me off! And then--well, I probably shouldn't tell you this but I can't resist. You ask if I have any indication as to his feelings, and I think I have the very best sort of indication... you see, after he had told me he would be willing to talk to Armando, he... kissed me! And then because he's such a perfect gentleman, he apologized straight away for being so bold, but I confess I was too delighted at such a keen display of his sentiment that I wasn't even able to be upset about it.
Oh, Nova, it was nothing at all like I'd imagined. I told you that Mr. Dawlish tried to kiss me, and that I wouldn't let him. Well, the idea of it with him just made me feel so... I don't even know what to say about it. Not at all keen on the idea, that's for certain. I felt as though every time he tried to touch me it was like someone with muddy hands was touching a fine lace gown of mine, as though he was leaving stains that I would never be able to wash out. When Mr. Devine touched me (for he did, but only by holding onto my hand and once placing his fingers on my cheek, in a very respectable way and not at all like Mr. Dawlish did), I didn't feel dirty or stained at all. It was as though everything was aglow, and warm... I don't know how else to describe it. It was like the feeling of getting underneath a big blanket that you've had since you were a child: comfortable and familiar and just sort of
right.
Oh, I'm rambling and I don't know if I'm making any sense, but of course you know the sensation I'm describing. It must be the same sort of thing when you're with Mr. Malfoy, isn't it?
You must promise not to tell anyone about the kiss--Mr. Devine was very apologetic about it and I shouldn't want anyone to think less of him for it!
Affectionately,
Ophelia