teplyy nezhnyy ch'i-to ruki

[Nadia Volkova]

(OOC: Thread title: The warmth of someone's gentle arms)

Nadia was trying to get used to her new dresses, but she kept trying to avoid them she were choosing a dress for the day. She still had the dresses she would want to be seen in, but she could not risk her child’s health by going against Alexei on something so simple. He had set up the rule, she was going to wear those dresses when there were just the two of them or she would be in trouble again. She kept hoping that he would tell her that there would be people visiting them the day after, so she could wear the dresses she preferred, even if it meant she had to play the perfect happy wife.

Standing in front of her closet, looking at the dresses, she wished that she had something to drink. If nothing else then the tea her father always made for her. If she were up in the night, unable to sleep, she used to put just a tiny bit of his scotch in it, to help her sleep. She would give a lot for that right now- her fathers calming voice, while she was sitting in front of the fire with a cup of tea. She sighed. “If only –“ she said in English. She still spoke English when she was alone, if nothing else, then to not completely forget the language that was her birth language.

Nadia considered writing to her father, letting him know that she was alright and still living. Well, parts of her were still living, some of her personality had definitely left her, some of her will to stay strong, but she wanted to become a mother, so she refused to let Alexei break her completely. She believed that she was stronger than him.

  

[Alexei Volkov]

Since the incident where Nadia had tried to refuse him one of his desires and then spoken in English in his house, Alexei had been keeping a close eye on his little wife. She was nearly three quarters of the way through her pregnancy, and Alexei had too much time invested in her to find that she was an utter failure as a bride — especially after he had wasted so much time on Ivana.

He would always remember his failure with Ivana, and he would never allow himself to ignore the slightest warning sign that Nadia might be turning out the same way.

If only —

The words in English made Alexei narrow his eyes from where he was waiting behind the barely cracked door. The little slut thought that she could speak English in his home? Russian only, he had told her. He had told her that on their wedding day, and yet she kept 'slipping' and speaking English.

Alexei opened the door and looked imperiously at his wife. "Nadia," he said threateningly, "what language do we speak in my home?" It was bad enough that he had to put up with English-speaking servants; he would not tolerate it from his wife!

  

[Nadia Volkova]

The second Nadia’s door opened and she heard Alexei’s voice, Nadia knew she was in trouble. He had obviously heard her, otherwise he would never ask that question. She was still standing in only her chemise, but right now, she was not scared of standing in so little in front of Alexei, she had tried worse. No, what she was scared of was his reaction to the two English words she had said. She had not had any intention to continue on the sentence, but she knew that two words were enough.

She quickly bowed her head and looked down at the floor. “I apologize, Master. I am only to speak Russian.” She said and waited for the punishment. She knew that it would come, she was just unsure of what it would be this time. “I know I promised not to do it ever again, but – There is no excuse.” She added. Tears were already starting to form in the corners of her eyes, but she did not allow them to fall just yet. She still had no reason to cry, she should be stronger than this.

  

[Alexei Volkov]

She was already crying, which was a good thing. Still, Alexei was not about to go easy on her. If he went soft on Nadia, she would misbehave, and he would have to either kill her or divorce her and start all over for a third time.

Killing her would be cleaner, but divorce didn't require him to mourn.

It was clearly far preferable for Alexei to correct Nadia's behavior instead of having to replace her. He was, after all, not getting any younger and Nadia was making progress. As such, he was going to continue to put in the effort ... at least so long as Nadia continued to make progress.

It was too bad that Nadia was roundly pregnant, because he would have loved to teach her a very violent lesson. He had not enjoyed her for far too long and he was not going to be kind to her once he could have her once more.

"Beg, Nadia," he said in a dangerously quiet tone. "Beg, because I see no reason not to lock you in your room" — without, of course, quill or ink or any other method of contacting the outside world — "until you forget that English exists."

  

[Nadia Volkova]

Nadia could not stop the tears from slowly falling down her cheeks, but she was not in any hurry to dry them away. She was terrified of Alexei, and his quiet tone and steely eyes did not help sooth her worries even the slightest. She knew she had messed up. It had not been that long since she had done the exact same thing as she just had, so it seemed absolutely insane to already have messed up again. She knew that there would be no excuse that would be good enough or give her even the slightest hope of getting away with it. The only thing she could think of was to as Alexei said the second he said it.

As he told her to beg, she quickly knelt down, even if it still caused her a little trouble. “I beg you Master. If I forget English completely – then I will be isolated here. Then I fear that I might say something wrong at any party, and I would hate if I was the reason there where people who thought bad of you, just because I messed up.” She said. She was far from sure that it would be good enough.

“I know that I went against your rules again, and that I should be punished. I will take any punishment you think I deserve.” She added, hoping slightly that her words of knowing that she should be punished as well as her acceptance of it would make him just a tiny bit softer. It was a very small chance and hope, she knew that, but anything that could make feel even the tiniest bit of hope was worth a chance for her.

  

[Alexei Volkov]

It was a struggle not to kick her in the side; Alexei had to remind himself that she was carrying his child, his daughter or his heir. If he damaged Nadia too badly, he could injure his child.

"Do better, Nadia. Stop making excuses and grovel. Make me believe that you are sorry."

  

[Nadia Volkova]

Nadia looked at Alexei shortly, she was really in trouble right now. “Please Master, I will do anything for you. You are my master, I belong to you and I should never have undermined your authority the way I have, time and time again.” She begged. She was kneeling, still only in her chemise. “Please, please, please Master. I do not know what I should say or do to make you know just how sorry I am for doing what I did.”

She quickly wiped away the tears that was rolling down her cheeks “Take away time of my leisure, just – please do not hurt the child. That is all I ask. It is not his fault that I am so stupid I keep messing up and making mistakes.” She begged, not caring if she was getting into pain herself, but she would not ever be able to forgive herself if she was the reason her child was hurt in any way.

  

[Alexei Volkov]

The corner of Alexei's lips curled up slightly; the sight of his wife on her knees and begging him not for her sake but for his child's — that certainly made him hopeful for the chances of Nadia being something other than an abject failure.

"I will never hurt my child, Nadia," Phineas said smoothly. He reached down and grasped her face roughly and smirked at the tears on her face. She was his, and he was not going to let her go. Ever. Her only way out of this was death, and he would be very put out if she died before he wanted her to.

"Now, I will not hurt you either, this time — but if you speak one more word of English in my home I will remove a week from your leisure. If you speak a second word, I will remove two additional weeks, and so on — so that little slip of yours would have cost you three weeks. A third word will be four weeks, and each word will double. Do you understand, Nadia?"

  

[Nadia Volkova]

Nadia just quickly tensed when Alexei got hold of her jaw, but she knew it was insane to try and pull her head away from him. It was not something that would help her, and it might make him annoyed. And Alexei annoyed was usually not a good thing. Especially not this close to one of her slips. So she just sat there and looked up at him. She felt slightly better with herself when he assured her that he would never hurt any child of theirs, it made her feel safe. She could simply not imagine letting her children get hurt even the slightest if she could avoid it. And while she may not be able to protect them from everything, then knowing that he would not be one of the things, made the list shorter.

When he said that he would let her go this once, she felt relieved and extremely grateful - though she disliked slightly being grateful to him, she knew what it meant, but she truly were grateful for this. "I understand Master. You are very kind and I am very grateful." she said softly and looked at him. Four words will mean eight weeks taken from my leisure, the entire leisure in case of a girl. Only five words will remove the entire leisure from having given birth to a boy. she quickly thought and she knew that he would probably hear any word she said and he would not give her another chance. She had learned that much from being married to Alexei