Early Bird

[Abraham Aesalon]

August 17, 1883

Aches. They had become the most commonplace of things since her stomach started to extend and even still Abe wasn’t at all able to block the pains. At least, not that day. Of course that had no bearing on what her schedule would be. Eze was off of work and she was supposed to go in. So she’d do it even if she woke up earlier than she ought to because of aches that seemed unnatural. But she pushed them aside - Spawn had to cook another month - and decided that it must have been nothing. Perhaps that was her first mistake, pushing it aside, but work was important. If nothing else, she would be able to financially support the child. She still wasn’t sold on the idea that she could be a good mother but she was determined that she would provide a more comfortable life for Spawn than she was able to be given. So when the time came for her to go to work, she did such, aches and all.

So she went to work. What else could she do? Hopefully it would be a slow day. Since being promoted to Assistant Manager she less and less had to do menial tasks and usually took care of more important and less taxing jobs. Of course she still dabbled in all manner of work there but primarily she saw to it that things were running smoothly. She was behind the counter when things started to go downhill. A jolt of pain shot through her, weird and very much worrying. Her mind instantly went on alert and she walked out from behind the bar in attempts to get herself up to Dionne’s apartment to rest. She refused to believe it was time but it would be very soon when she would have to face that it was. She leaned on the bar as she walked along it, glad that at that time of day no one was really sitting there, and tried to ignore the pains as they progressively got more intense. She could do this. It would pass. Everything would be okay.

Or not. She was forced to believe that it would not be okay as a definitely-not-piss liquid came from her undercarriage and gushed onto the floor. She groaned at the pain in her back and how very tense she felt as she looked down at her pants that were soaked. Embarrassing, yes, but she was more worried about the fact that it was time. Spawn was coming. And she was bloody terrified. “Oh Merlin’s tits!” She exclaimed, her eyes wide as she looked around wildly, not entirely certain what to do. She had to clean up the mess! But she felt as though if she moved in that moment, she would topple over. The shock and discomfort was mounting and all she could do was stare. She was barely aware of the patron who was coming over to help her. All she could think was balls, balls, Merlin’s hairy bollocks a mantra that she repeated in her head to try to make sense of it all. She couldn’t have her baby in the Hog’s Head. She had to get home. She had to!

*Disclaimer: Anya has never been pregnant ever and as such everything she am writing is based on what she has researched on labor and pregnancy. Labor pains can range from anywhere to dull to serious pain and Abe is getting the bad end of the stick. Don't judge too harshly because again Anya has no experience with pregnancy/giving birth.*

  

[Konnor Broadmoor]

Konnor was fairly sure there were better ways to spend his Friday afternoon. Anything was better than sitting around a bar, not drinking or talking to anyone. He didn’t know why he even kept on going to the Hog’s Head, if he was honest. The last time, he’d ended up covered in mead thanks to a few very drunk, very clumsy patrons. Perhaps it was because he didn’t have much else to do, or because - even if he didn’t do it out loud - some of the regulars of the Hog’s Head were fun to laugh at and with. Perhaps he only kept going because he’d done so ever since settling in the village, and it was a habit by now.

Whatever the reason, he sat near the end of the bar nursing the same bottle of butterbeer he’d ordered at four and alone. He was used to it, though, so he kept to himself like he usually did on nights like these... At least until a woman he recognized as being staff at the Hog’s Head said something about Merlin’s tits and suddenly a sweet smell hit him like a wave. Turning in his chair, Konnor was smart enough to realize the woman - whose belly looked like she was about to pop with child - was beginning to... pop with child. He stood up immediately, setting his butterbeer on the bar counter and rushing to the woman’s side.

“Miss, d’you need some help?” he inquired genuinely, fishing in his jacket pocket for his wand. He didn’t know many spells, but cleaning up owl shit was a big part of his job description (even as manager). The incantation whispered under his breath, the weird sweet-smelling clear stuff was magicked away from the floor of the bar and the front of the girl’s... pants? Funny how long it had taken Konnor to realize that she wasn’t wearing a dress, but even upon noticing he simply gave a shrug. To each their own, he supposed, no matter how strange that was.

It was sort of ridiculous that Konnor didn’t know the lady’s name since, giving her a good look, she was pretty much always around. And he prided himself on being observant. Ruddy good job he was doing at that. He was fairly sure she was a squib, and Kon’d seen her put fear into grown men - drunk or sober - on multiple occasions despite the fact that she did not even reach Konnor’s shoulder. That fact alone made seeing her with such a look of complete shock on her face even stranger. But right now, looking at her was going to do no one any good because pregnant women leaking and yelling curses was something that he was pretty sure required action.

  

[Abraham Aesalon]

The voice was enough to get her out of her little daze and she looked at the guy wanting to scowl and say ‘no I’ll just squat and pop the babe out right here’ but managing to keep any snarky thoughts to herself because yes, she needed help. “I need to get home. I need to get home right now because I am not putting on a show and giving birth right here.” She said it quickly and with a hint of panic in her voice because this could not be happening. She wasn’t due until September and it was the middle of August still. It was strange to think that she was about to really become a mother that in just a short amount of time she’d be home and in her bed and giving birth to her slightly illegitimate child. Holy hell. It was really happening. It was really happening. Her wide eyes blinked.

“Holy hell I’m going to be a mother.” She felt as though she were slowly going to disappear into a mumbling, incoherent mess because she couldn’t wrap her head around the fact that she would have to push a child out of her undercarriage and then proceed to raise that child until it was an adult. Suddenly she wanted to just find a way to keep it in there forever because she’d rather be perpetually pregnant than have to actually take care of another human being for seventeen odd years. But that was an insane thought and a stab of pain in her back made her bend over and rest her hands on her knees with a groan. She had to get home. She had to get home so that her mother could call upon the midwife and help her through this because Spawn was ready to meet its family.

Stumbling the few steps forward, still in pain, she grabbed the strangers arm. “I need to get home please.” She couldn’t walk home and she wasn’t sure it was safe to floo in this particular situation. And he offered help. Merlin help her she hated asking for help but she could barely stand let alone walk herself all the way back to Bartonburg. So like it or not the stranger was someone that she needed to help her. Because if she didn’t get home right that moment she’d topple over and give up and she really didn’t want to have Spawn at her working place. She already knew her child would likely spend time in there a lot when they got older but she’d really rather it was born at home in the comfort of her own bed surrounded by her mother and midwife woman.

  

[Konnor Broadmoor]

Konnor put an arm around the lady’s shoulder when she stumbled forward, not sure if she would fall over without him supporting her. She really was tiny, and that big of a belly had to throw someone her size off balance. Not to mention, the expression she wore was one of pain and... Well, with all of these things, he had to help the poor girl. Leaning down, he scooped her up into his arms and, with a glance at his half finished butterbeer, started out the door. Getting his apparition license had been a fairly recent thing, and he didn’t trust himself to side-along with someone in the condition the girl was.

It took him a few minutes to realize he had been carrying her for a while with no idea where ‘home’ was and no explanation as to why he was carrying her in the first place, so he decided to amend that. “Um, where exactly d’you live?” he asked hurriedly, adjusting his grip on her legs. This was definitely not how he’d thought he would spend his Friday evening, but it was already shaping up to be more interesting and exciting than anything he would ever have done. Konnor hoped she didn’t live somewhere in the Slums, because navigating those streets was hard enough when you knew you were going.

This was serious, though. There was a baby on it’s way into the world, and somehow Kon had gotten himself caught up making sure that that happened the way his - or her, he supposed - mum wanted it to happen. It struck him suddenly that this girl was roughly the same age his mum had been when she’d had him. Hopefully she was in a better situation, and had someone waiting for her at home eager to be a father to the child she was having. Still fairly close to High Street, he didn't yet know where he was supposed to be going, but figured that going in the opposite direction from the Hog’s Head was as good a direction as any.

  

[Abraham Aesalon]

Despite the fact that she was tiny even in her pregnancy, she was somewhat surprised by the ease with which the man scooped her up into his arms. Not that he was exactly small but she thought she must have gained a billion pounds. Regardless of it she just wrapped her arms around his neck so as not to fall and die (being short put her ill at ease in any heights) and just tried not to yell a stream of curses because her back felt as though it were about to shatter. The last thing on her mind was telling him her address. Hell did she even know her own address? She couldn’t recall the house number but she knew where it was. So through gritted teeth she seethed through her pain: “Bartonburg.” Hoping that he would be okay with her just directing him when the time came.

It wasn’t lost on Abe how ridiculously awkward this was. She didn’t like people. She disliked most of the Hog’s Head patrons even less. And now she was in the arms of one, letting him carry her home and hoping that the babe didn’t crawl out of her quim before she got home. It was almost funny - almost - that of course her birthing process couldn’t be normal. She couldn’t be at home when it happened, no. She had to be at work. She had to make a spectacle of herself. She had to be carried home by some stranger as she wore the most atrociously unattractive face every because dammit she was in pain. So she couldn’t help it, a chuckle came out of her lips that quickly dissolved into a curse of “bloody hell” because laughing just made her hurt even more.

He must have thought she was insane. She thought she was insane. “I’ll tell you my house when we get to it.” She managed slowly, trying to steady her breathing. She wanted Eze. She wanted her mother. She wanted Spawn to get out of her even if it was early. Hopefully it’d be okay. The realization that Spawn was a month early made Abe blanch. Did that mean it’d die? Could it survive being born this early? She almost wanted to tell the man never to get pregnant because it was hell then she remembered that it was in fact a man and he couldn’t get pregnant. So instead she said this: “Keep your pecker in your pants if you care about a woman. Pregnancy is -” she cut off with a groan of pain “it’s hell.” She finished.

  

[Konnor Broadmoor]

Ducking down a street to the left, he was tempted to curse under his breath because Bartonburg was far. At least far in terms of the distance he needed to carry a pregnant lady about to squeeze in infant out of her nether regions. He wished he could do something to ease the pain but his knowledge of spells was limited and... well, he wasn’t the weirdo who carried around potions and things in his pants so there went that idea. What did you do when someone was giving birth in your arms? Tell them to think happy thoughts and say ‘expecto patronum’? No, that wasn’t right. Breath deeply? Konnor had no idea what to do to help this girl, and he felt pretty useless in this situation. Well, not entirely: he had working legs and he was using them to get her home as fast as he possibly could.

He walked-slash-ran faster when he heard her curse. She looked like whatever was happening in her lady parts was hurting like hell. “Is there anythin’ at all that I can do t’help?” he said breathily, putting more effort into moving forward than talking. They were just about getting to Wellingtonshire, and people were starting to stare. Konnor could care less about people staring, honestly, but the expensive dresses and hats the people staring wore were a sign of how deep into the rich neighborhood they were getting. Some were more discreet than others, but no one offered their help to a woman who obviously needed medical attention. Which he hoped would be available wherever it was she lived.

Konnor couldn’t help the blush from getting into his cheeks when she mumbled something about his pecker. He was pretty sure she meant to keep it to himself because getting a woman with child was the worst thing a man could do - in her mind, that was - but hearing her say it so close to his ear... He didn’t know exactly why he got embarrassed, but he did, and that was that. Another thing he didn’t know was how to respond to said pecker comment, but babbling was a habit of his and that wasn’t spontaneously about to change. “Y’don’t want to have a baby? Why’s that? I can imagine at least ten worse things than being pregnant.”

  

[Abraham Aesalon]

When he asked if there was anything he could do to help, she just waved him off because no - there was nothing he could do. Getting her home was the best he could do for her and she was rather thankful that he was willing to do that. After all she was just some strange, grumpy squib who happened to be about to burst with child. It hadn’t really crossed her mind how strange it was that he was willing to help. Or maybe her thoughts on people were just far more negative than they ought to be. Whatever the reason she was sure that it was strange how helpful he was being but she wasn’t about to push him aside and try to get home herself. No, she had no choice but to accept the help he was so easily offering her. Because she wasn’t about to give birth in the middle of the streets.

“I’m not too keen on the thought of pushing a child out of my quim, no.” She said when he asked if she didn’t want the baby. It wasn’t that she didn’t want Spawn but she certainly wasn’t looking forward to actually giving birth. She’d heard it was painful. And how could it not be? A top-heavy child was being pushed out of her crotch. That wasn’t a very big opening. How the hell was a human supposed to come out of it? The look of fear was clear on her face. She did not look forward to that at all. And worse still Eze wouldn’t be with her. The midwife refused to help her deliver the baby with a man present and she was pretty sure Eze wouldn’t want to be there anyways because he was a cad. Really, he was the worst husband ever. And he was the one that put her in her current position.

She couldn’t believe that he could think of things worse than pregnancy. “I think you’d think differently if you could feel what I’m feeling.” She said it in a voice that was strained because she was trying to breathe evenly and keep from cursing. Balls, when would they get to Bartonburg? She wanted to be home. She wanted to be in her bed, ready to prepare for this child to come out of her. But of course things had to be difficult. Things could never be easy for her. But she had to not think about such things. She had to think about...rainbows and butterflies. She grimaced at the thought of something so girly. No, that wouldn’t work. Maybe she could instead focus on the fact that she had a nice man helping her home so surely everything would be fine. Yes. Great idea.

  

[Konnor Broadmoor]

Konnor was far from the innocent person the blush on his cheeks would pronounce him. But hearing a girl talk about things coming out of her quim was enough to make any grown man squirm. Girl things were girl things, not things Konnor ever heard about growing up. Sure, his mum was a little more... liberal than other mums, in telling him things about shagging and the like, but... babies? Men put them in women’s bellies and they cared for the gals when they were preggers but men usually weren’t there when the thing was actually being brought into the world. It seemed like he was going to get a crash course in all that, though, what with the fact that it was happening to the woman in his arms.

He really needed to figure out her name because “girl”, “lady”, “woman”, and “pregnant person” were getting old.

“I can imagine I would,” he mused with a breathy chuckle. The thought of pushing a baby out of any orifice - even one he decidedly did not have - was terrifying. And if the look of pain on her face was anything to go by, it was horrible. All of a sudden, he remembered his neighbors back in London - the SomethingorothersthatstartedwithaKs. Eleven kids and counting, and Konnor remembered that Mrs. SomethingorotherthatstartedwithaK had once delivered triplets! From the looks of it, this girl could also have been delivering triplets, because she looked like she was about to explode. Literally and figuratively, but that was besides the point.

From where they were, he stopped for a moment to get his bearings. The fact of the matter was that street signs took too long to decipher and remember, so he usually got around using landmarks. Thank Merlin he delivered mail when it came back to the post office, because if not, the lady would have been shit out of luck trying to get him to find Bartonburg. The familiar sloping rooftop of the Huntington house - they were rubbish at labelling addresses so it was a frequent stop - came into view, and Konnor sprinted off in that direction. Bartonburg at last!

“What does ya house look like? Recognize any of these?” he sputtered. It was hard to talk and think and watch where he was going and keep his grip on the girl tight, for fear of dropping her. She wasn’t very heavy, but Kon was used to lugging around things at the steel mill and now at the office. Still, he’d been carrying her for a good twenty minutes, and walking as fast as he could in confidence that he wouldn’t drop her on her bum, and it was exerting.

  

[Abraham Aesalon]

At any other time Abe might have thought his blush was cute and taunt him for it in the friendliest manner Abe was possible. But at that moment, she was too frantically worried that Spawn would just strut out of her body and fall splat onto the ground. As if newborns could strut. All in all her mind was doing ridiculous things. For a moment she had to hold back a laugh at the thought of a babe literally strutting out of her. Then she had to hide the grimace at the thought of it splatting onto the ground. She needed to focus. Focus on trying not to squirm because she was in pain and on the words he was saying to her. She didn’t really hear them the first time around and went “Huh?” dumbly before finally realizing what he had said. He’d asked her if she saw her house.

“Oh - no.” She said with a shake of her head, her voice coming out strangely because she was trying to keep from whining at the pressure she felt on her back. “It’s further towards the slums...” She hoped it wouldn’t take much longer. She wasn’t sure how much longer she had. She hadn’t read anything about the actual process of giving birth and she’d avoided the topic any time it came up. Which, in hindsight, was really stupid. She had no idea what to expect past the idea of having to push a child out of her. How did one even do that? What if she couldn’t and the babe was just stuck in there forever? The thought made Abe’s eyes go wide. She couldn’t stand a lifetime of being pregnant like that. She couldn’t.

Her eye caught on a familiar garden that she always admired and she looked at her helper and spoke: “It should be coming up soon...five or so minutes.” Her voice was laced with relief. She’d be home soon and that was all that mattered. Her husband would be there until they pushed him out and her mom could get in touch with the midwife and she’d...Merlin’s tits she’d be a mother. The idea was terrifying. She’d be a mother. Spawn was going to be in the world and she would officially be a mother. It was scary to think of. So she tried not to. Instead she stared at each approaching house, counting down until they would reach hers.

  

[Konnor Broadmoor]

Five minutes. He could do five minutes no problem, but he hoped that that was a legit estimation and not the ravings of a pregnant lady mad with pain. Oh, well. While he couldn’t look over at her too much because he was trying to watch where he was going - lamp posts hitting him in the face were too common for him to like - he knew that the pain was getting worse. Konnor waited a few minutes before asking her again if anything was familiar. “Recognize anythin’?” He hoped so.

Someone had to be home, right? For the lady, while she did her girl thing and pushed a baby out of her? The thought gave him shivers because a baby coming out of someone seemed like something he knew happened but didn’t seem all that real. Girl stuff was all weird. And he had some part in helping that to happen. Nothing too important, sure, but something. He was a good samaritan this time around, and he hoped that nothing happened to this girl or her child just... because.

  

[Abraham Aesalon]

She nearly flailed when she saw her house. "There! There it is!" She pointed and continued to point until he approached the door when she grabbed the knob and pushed it open, knowing that Eze wouldn't have locked it. The moment the man stepped over the threshold she screeched out her husbands name with pain in her voice: "Eze! Eze I need you!" She screamed it loudly, hoping he would show up quickly so that she wouldn't have to call him again.

It wasn't long when she saw him running around a doorway - and Merlin did her heart beat fast because he'd run to her - and she gave him a pathetic look hoping that he wouldn't lose his shit like he looked like he was about to. "It's time, Eze, I swear we're gonna be parents by the days end." She said, holding her arms out to him as he came to get her from the strangers arms. She was unsure if Eze could even hold her up but pleasantly surprised when he did despite the fact that he looked as scared as she felt.

Eze didn't say anything but she could tell by the nod that he was trying to thank the stranger even if he couldn't speak. "Thanks a bunch." She said over her husband's shoulder, hating to leave that guy there but sure he'd let himself out because really she couldn't dally. She needed her mother to get a hold of the midwife because she was having Spawn that day it seemed.